Friday, November 16, 2007

my way? not quite.

Today we went to a Navy Big Band concert down in Waikiki, so it was written into this week's dinner plan that we would get fast food for dinner on the way home tonight. It was 6:00 by the time we got near home (we usually eat by 5). I pass Taco Bell, Jack's and McDonald's about 4 blocks from my house, but I decided that I wanted a spicy chicken Tendercrisp, so I went out of my way to go to Burger King. I went to the drive through and placed my order, and the woman told me that they don't have the spicy sauce anymore. I literally said, "Are you kidding me???" You don't fuck with a pregnant woman's cravings. Especially when it's an hour past her usual dinner time.

"We have a new spicy chicken sandwich. Would you like to try that?" I paused to consider. I could get a regular Tendercrisp with no mayo (the reason I started getting it spicy in the first place was because it was easier than ordering it with no mayo), but then it wouldn't be spicy. I could get the new one, but then the chicken itself would be spicy instead of the sauce - and that was the whole reason behind the brilliance of the Spicy Tendercrisp: regular, crispy chicken; tons of creamy, spicy sauce. What I really wanted to do was just leave and go somewhere else, but it was getting late. So I ordered the new one.

What the woman didn't tell me is that the new spicy chicken sandwich is HALF THE SIZE of a Tendercrisp. I'm not exaggerating. Half the size. If even that big. I was still so hungry after I ate it that I ate all of my fries, which NEVER happens. AND I'M STILL HUNGRY. This from the reflux-y pregnant chick who just discussed with one of my doctors yesterday how my appetite is completely gone and I only gained a pound and a half between 11 and 15 weeks. I'm still frickin' starving. That was fast-food money well spent.

Also. The damn thing had mayo on it. GRRRRRRRAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH. I wiped it off, which of course necessitated removing the lettuce as well. So I was left with a tiny piece of barely spicy (although crispy, I'll give them that) chicken on a small bun - because thats all that was on it, lettuce and mayo. No tomato.

So, congratulations, Burger King. You went from having the hands-down best and most unique spicy chicken sandwich out there to having a spicy chicken sandwich that tastes exactly like everyone else's. Bravo!!


Mother Hoodwink said...

Probably not what you're looking for but Wendy's spicy chicken sandwich is the best I've ever had. Especially when you alternate bites with a bite of Frosty. Mmmm. I ate that at least six days a week when pregnant with Gavin.

Kerry said...

Makes me wish he had Wendy's. :(

Mother Hoodwink said...

What?! No Wendy's out there? That sucks!

Kerry said...

Also no Target, no Olive Garden, no Smoothie King...the list goes on and on. And I miss Raising Cain's, too, but of course that's a Louisiana thing and I didn't expect to find it here...but I still miss it.

Mother Hoodwink said...

Seriously with Olive Garden, you're not missing much. The past couple years they have gone way down. The breadsticks are so freaking salty now and they have added too much vinegar to the salads. And I swear I can taste the the frostbite with the pasta dishes. Of course this could be just the Olive Gardens here. Who knows?

Kerry said...

Brian has just informed me that we do, in fact, have a Wendy's. It's behind the motorcycle dealer, apparently.
I don't miss Olive Garden so much since going to the Macaroni Grill. Pretty much the same thing.