Wednesday, April 9, 2008

pregnant forever, like Bonnie on Family Guy

(Just a quick note before I start, I'm going to be trying to use Hypnobabies terminology from here on out. Pressure wave or surge = contraction; birthing time = labor; guess date = due date)

So I feel pretty silly right about now. First of all, how ridiculous is it that I'm getting impatient with almost two weeks to go until my guess date? Never mind that this baby has already stayed in 5 days longer than Brandon could honestly be any time between now and May and still be completely within the range of normal.

I feel silly, though, because I made no secret of the fact that I thought he would be here last week. I was honestly really trying to keep him in "for just a few more days". I was so worried that he'd come before April, because I really want an April baby. (Now, of course, I'm worried he'll stay in until May!) And Brian had some really important stuff going on at work last week that he really couldn't miss, so I was really, really focusing on "no earlier than Thursday."

So I feel ridiculous now. Because every single person I talk to says something to the effect of, "you haven't had that baby yet?" My coworkers said it to me when I took Brandon to a music class on Friday. My yoga teacher said it on Sunday morning. (She had actually been at the music class on Friday with her twins and even she was sure I'd get my birthing time started that day with all of the jumping up and down and whatnot.) All of Brian's coworkers said it on Sunday afternoon when we went to a Big Band concert at the mall - seriously, I got it about 8 times within a minute and a half. My chiropractor said it yesterday. Brian calls me at least three times a day to ask if I'm having pressure waves. My guess date isn't until the 19th! But it's my own fault for being so sure he would be just as early as Brandon.

To be fair though, this is what I've been dealing with from myself: the baby dropped at around 34 or 35 weeks, and again at 36 (he started out high and now he is crazy low). At 35 weeks I started feeling a lot of downward pressure. The weekend that I turned 37 weeks, I started having (fairly intense) pressure waves that last five minutes or more, every couple of hours. Last Wednesday I started feeling crampy - you know that feeling like your period is about to start? With Brandon that happened on Tuesday and he was born on Saturday. I've been losing my mucous plug in little bits for at least a week. Some time last week...I don't even remember anymore what day it was...the crazy long pressure waves started alternating with normal-ish ones (1-2 minutes) that are followed by another two or three minutes of intense downward pressure. (Like I had with Brandon, except that the pressure was in my back with him, so at least I know this one's head is going in the right direction.) The pressure that follows the surge is actually a LOT harder to deal with than the surge itself. A lot. Well anyway, this happens maybe once or twice an hour. Not regularly, though - it'll be maybe 2 that are 9 minutes apart, and then it'll be 2.5 hours with nothing. I wake up hourly at night, I'm nauseous when I get up in the morning, Sunday morning I woke up to a pressure wave that lasted NINE MINUTES, and I didn't manage to avoid the stretch marks like I did last time. They are getting worse every day. Every once in a while when I stand up, I can feel my hip bones spreading apart. For a while on...Thursday, maybe?...I was walking around like I had just climbed off of a horse because I felt like my pelvis was about to fall apart.

So is it any wonder that I spent a whole week going to bed every night thinking, "tomorrow is the day"???

At this point, I'm starting to accept these pressure waves as something I just have to live with, and I've pretty much decided that this baby is never coming out. I'm going to be pregnant forever. That might seem like a negative thought to have, but it's actually pretty liberating. I never made it to this point in pregnancy with Brandon, the point where you just want to get it over with already, and I just don't know any other way to deal with it. Visualizing isn't working. Walking, pineapple, Italian food and driving on bumpy roads aren't working. I give up. He can just stay in, and that's okay. Whatever.


Mother Hoodwink said...

I think you and I have the same problem. You tell your body to wait until a certain point to have the baby and your body listens too well and you end up pregnant longer than you thought you would.

I don't know how hard you're walking but the night before I had my appointment that would determine if I was to be induced, Josh and I walked all around the base. I was basically walking so fast I could have been running. Josh was having a hard time keeping up with me. Of course I had to stop every few minutes and have a contraction, but I really think the hard walking helped kick start things. The next day I was having consistent contractions eight minutes apart.

Hang in there. And hey, if you end up with a May baby, I can guarantee you, they really are awesome.

Kerry said...

LOL, I waddle - I mean walk - as fast as is possible with a bowling ball in my pelvis. Trying to keep up with Brian is always a challenge, but power walking isn't really an option for me at this point. But I do my best.

I'm sure May babies are beyond awesome, but if I am still pregnant at 42 weeks I'll probably be giving birth in a prison cell because somebody around me is going down. Probably whoever is stupid enough to say "I thought you were having this baby five weeks ago?"